Montana Outdoors

March 20, 2006

The etymology of entomology, or something like that.

Filed under: Fishin' stories, Fishing, Humor, Montana, Nature, Outdoors — montucky @ 7:34 pm

It’s common knowledge that fish come from fish markets unless you live in a flood zone, and then they all too frequently come directly in through your front door or your living room window, depending on the direction of the current and the time of the month as noted in the Solunar tables.

After doing some research on the subject of fish markets, mainly by placing random calls to various residents of our larger East-coast cities, I determined that it’s also common knowledge that while the products for sale in the markets are food, the products themselves do not eat food and have never been guilty of consuming any even when they were alive, something I wouldn’t have guessed, not coming from a large city myself. “And how dare you infer that the fish I am so fond of eating would stoop to eating bugs! You know fish eat nothing but fish food!”

(I also found out that while residents of our larger East-coast cities don’t especially enjoy receiving random calls asking questions about fish markets, they don‘t mind at all giving directions to callers over the phone and I now have an extensive list of interesting places to visit, most of which might be a more than a little warm this time of year.)

As a result of my newly acquired knowledge about the non-eating habits of fish, I’ve had to re-think my previously opinion that 95% of a large trout’s diet consists of small flying insects, something I read in The Outdoor Life during my developing years.

Contrary to the opinions of those who were involved (or violated as they put it) in my research, it never especially disturbed me that by partaking of a delicious trout dinner I was eating insects, once removed: in fact I had never thought about it before.

I’ve never ingested insects directly myself other than on a few motorcycle rides, mainly because around here most flying insects have little fishhooks embedded in them, making them very hard on the teeth and even harder to digest.

But otherwise…? Stone flies: Yuck! Salmon flies: Disgusting! Trout Almondine: Scrumptious! It’s just a matter of when you eat the insects. (I don’t know what almonds eat, but I suspect there was a barnyard animal involved around there somewhere, if you got the roots of the matter, and it probably doesn’t matter, because nobody I’ve ever talked to objected to eating almonds.)

I also occasionally like to consume a large plate of Virginia baked ham, especially during the holidays, and if you know what hogs eat, please keep it to yourself! I buy my pork at a meat market!

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